Listening to Protect Ya Neck by the Wu-Tang Clan (“The Wu” for short) on my way home from work last week, and nearly twenty years after this track was released I finally unlocked the metaphorical wizardry of the lyrics (for the quick and narrow, The Wu are an ensemble of rappers, arguably the greatest rap group of all time). As legend has it, The Wu were inspired to write this song by their experience on the mean streets of New York City, mainly Staten Island. The rappers are known by many names, but collectively they took on the moniker of The Killer Bees (Killa Beez to be exact), the macho posturing of the nickname was clear and present; killer bees are assassins in disguise, small and innocent in appearance, but vicious in nature. But The Wu are too clever for this – that is the low hanging fruit for the simple minded – they went for the triple lindy of rap, the double entendre! Spoiler Alert! The Killer Bees is not only a moniker for a group of gentleman with an appetite for street justice, but rather a second deeper metaphor for another innocent in appearance and vicious in nature creature…the elusive small child.
It took me almost twenty years to figure it out because I had no frame of reference. You have no clue how innocently violent a child can be, until you get a hard driven head butt to the bridge of the nose at 3:27 in the morning. This kind of rude awakening starts to condition you. I am a student of the art of “protecting ya neck”, and the training has been merciless. For example, we will occasionally let our our daughter sleep in our bed when she’s having a really rough night (teething, ear ache, etc). This is a ploy of course. After a little soothing, she falls asleep between my wife and I. In my head I am saying, “SUCCESS! She’s back asleep, a few more minutes and I’ll put her back in her crib.” As my premature sense of accomplishment starts to settle in, I close my eyes and begin to relax and SMACK! I get a round house open hand smack square across my face. A bullwhip in the darkness. Lesson, always protect yourself, even in the comfort of your bed. The lessons keep on coming; pushing her on the our swing set I had an incoming phone call, I looked down and peaked at my phone and KABLAM! Front kick to the johnson, and on the return swing another to the temple. Lesson, never take your eyes off your enemy. This is life’s incredibly amazing and cruel sense of humor, it’s ability to constantly reverse the roles. My child is the Benjamin Button Master Yoda of self defense, and I am just her humble student. She doesn’t know this of course, because she is just this little killer bee, abiding by the laws of nature, kicking her dad’s ass. To all you new parents out there, you best protect ya neck!
I swear, they are rapping about babies!
Until next time,
Dan
uninterruptedTHOUGHTS 